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A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 12:03 pm
by japhy
A sad Public Service Announcement

We all “know” the personalities on here, but behind every avatar there is an actually person and a real life. Most of us don’t know the person behind the anonymous chatter, but I do know several of you in your real life. I have known feral/shirley for many years, going back to our time when we both lived in Parkville and frequented LJW’s KUSports website.

The first time I met him was when I invited “shirley” and “her husband virgil” over for dinner sight unseen. At the predetermined hour a scruffy dude came walking up our sidewalk with a shit eating grin on his face. “So….you shirley or virgil?” The answer was “I am shirley; virgil wouldn’t come with me because she thought you might beat me up when you found out I wasn’t a woman.”

So that is how I met “virgil”, in absentia. She was the cautious, level headed one.

I could start with the snark about how she was the “better half” and all, but they were really a team. Both good people and complementary souls. They moved to Florida to be near “virgil’s” granddaughter several years ago and so I haven’t seen them lately, but we keep in touch.

After a long tough battle with cancer, “virgil” passed on Wednesday evening. Having watched a loved one pass that way it can be both a blessing as well as painful when it is finally over. I have spoken to feral a few times since then, he is pretty wiped out. It is going to take some time for him to process how to go on with life.

Luckily he has more people that love him than he probably realizes. We will get him through this.

Leawood and I have suggested he meet us at Solstice for some weed and tequila therapy, we will see.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 12:06 pm
by Deleted User 89
please pass along my condolences and kind words, japhy

i pm’d shirley, but he’s obviously and understandably got more important things to deal with

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 12:17 pm
by jhawks99
I knew "Virgil" was ill and not doing well. This is sad news. Thanks for sharing. Please pass along my condolences to "Shirley" as well.

RMan sent me a PM back in the .commie days telling me that Shirley is a guy. I didn't believe him at the time.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 12:24 pm
by UnholyLivingDead
Talking boxing on the old .com board with Shirley really helped spur my interest in the sport back in those early days.

Condolences to Shirley and the family as they process. Very sad to hear of the loss.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 12:26 pm
by Overlander
That sucks.
Shirley is good peeps.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:01 pm
by Leawood
He can bunk at my place on his way to Colorado. I can’t handle the altitude

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:27 pm
by Mjl
That sucks, sorry to hear.

I've been on these boards 10 years and never realized he was a dude.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:33 pm
by Overlander
Mjl wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:27 pm That sucks, sorry to hear.

I've been on these boards 10 years and never realized he was a dude.
Really?

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:46 pm
by Mjl
Overlander wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:33 pm
Mjl wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:27 pm That sucks, sorry to hear.

I've been on these boards 10 years and never realized he was a dude.
Really?
Yep

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:49 pm
by Deleted User 89
i thought he was a she for the longest time

it was only through pm’s that i learned otherwise

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 1:56 pm
by PhDhawk
But I thought Lobster and Shirley dated?

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 2:17 pm
by japhy
PhDhawk wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:56 pm But I thought Lobster and Shirley dated?
Do you have a problem with that?

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 2:26 pm
by PhDhawk
japhy wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 2:17 pm
PhDhawk wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:56 pm But I thought Lobster and Shirley dated?
Do you have a problem with that?
I thought lobster might.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 2:45 pm
by zsn
Condolences to family and friends. I never really “knew” Shirley and Virgil, but I am saddened regardless because I feel like this is a true community! RIP.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Mon May 10, 2021 4:57 pm
by ChalkRocker
Mjl wrote: Mon May 10, 2021 1:27 pm
...never realized he was a dude.
Glad I'm not the only one. I'm sorry to learn this under these circumstances, tho'. My sincere sympathy to him and his friends here on the board

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Tue May 11, 2021 9:51 am
by ousdahl
This is a big time bummer. RIP Virgil.

Years ago I remember exchanging pm’s with Shirley, who mentioned a wife, and my initial reaction was, whoa cool, lesbos!

But I think Japhy first spilled the Shirley gender reveal beans on me when we went fishing.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Tue May 11, 2021 10:24 am
by jfish26
I'm sorry to hear about this. Shirley, if and when you come around to reading this, my thoughts are with you and your loved ones.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Thu May 13, 2021 11:15 am
by pdub
Shirley is always a woman to me.
Of course, to me, words and prayers are kinda useless, but I’ll extend them because even if they are the tiniest bit useful, Shirley is my kinda gal, and she deserves everything/anything that can help in the time period of this life that sucks so very hard.

Best from pdub.
I’d send a box of half donuts if I knew where in Florida she lived.

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Thu May 13, 2021 11:17 am
by ousdahl
so like half a box of donuts orrr

Re: A sad PSA

Posted: Thu May 13, 2021 11:49 am
by pdub
No.
12 half donuts.
Duh.